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It's less than a week before Christmas.  Wal-Mart's already panicking because they haven't even put out the marketing material for next Christmas, yet.  I'm not worried, though.  I have everything I need.  Except for the presents.  But I still have…one…two…three…four Christmas shopping days left, so I'm good.

But HNT is here already, and as usual, I'm not prepared with anything witty or unbelievably brilliant.  And we're not even supposed to feature ourselves this time around.  The theme this week is things we'd like to wish on other people.  If you want to be technical, the wishes have to be for other bloggers.  Last year when we did this, I had a lot more blogging friends.  Most of the people that participated last year that I knew aren't with us anymore for various reasons.  There's a few, but most of the blogs I visit these days aren't doing HNT anymore.  And of those that I do visit that are HNT participants, I don't know well enough to offer wishes.  So I'm going to have to deviate from the theme slightly, and place these wishes on people that you may or may not know, and whom may or may not exist in real life.

With that being said, I shall now proceed with my three wishes:

Wish Number 1 goes to Mr. John Foster Blair, retired Commander of Space Force.  Mr. Blair is a man of many talents, not the least of which is managing to accumulate a vast array of questionable armaments for his personal space vessel, the Phoenix.  By questionable, we mean, of course, highly unlikely that it is legal for most of them to be mounted on a civilian vessel but are none the less fully "licensed and certified."  In exchange for these licenses and certifications, Mr. Blair is asked to "loan" his ship to Space Force and the Federal Space Marshall Agency for various high-stakes missions.  For example, hunting down a certain highly dangerous, inherently evil Arcossian pirate or investigating the unexplained disappearance of the entire crew of a Space Force battle cruiser, to name but a couple.  This Christmas, I wish Mr. Blair a new pair of Holton Mark VII phased plasma cannons in the 40-watt range to add to his ship's arsenal.  He's had his eye on those for a while, and it just pains me to see him not get them this year.

Wish Number 2 goes out to Mr. Steve (Steve) White.  A man who is not only a super-brilliant propulsion engineer (rocket scientist) but who also suffers from a decidedly un-macho last name because I couldn't come up with anything more manly sounding (Steve Austin was already taken).  Steve belongs to a group of avid rocket and computer super-hobbyists out to prove that they don't need any major brand name backing them in their quest to build unimaginably complex rocket devices.  During the launch of one of these devices, Steve and a pair of his closest friends (a goofy computer geek and a token smart chick) find a rather large and impressive alien space craft cleverly hidden in the Superstition Mountains in the Phoenix area.  Over the course of a year, the three of them learn how this thing works because, amazingly enough, all of the instructions to operate the ship are written in plain English.  Did I mention that this was an alien spacecraft?  From another planet?  And the instructions are conveniently on board?  Weird, huh?  Anyway, Steve's been lamenting on how nice it would be to have a hyper-drive unit from the mothership installed on his super-secret toy.  He has the core components he needs, actually.  All he's missing is a Flux Capacitating Hyperventilation Unit or whatever.  So for my second Christmas Wish, I hope he gets that, because Heaven knows I can't stand hearing him repeat "Flux Capacitating Hyperventilation Unit."

Wish Number 3 goes to Pahn 'Dero of the Arcossian Empire.  Pahn 'Dero is the commanding officer of the new Arcossian space station Vindicator.  Well, that's what the Arcossian word translates to in English, anyway.  The only real problem with Pahn 'Dero is that he's inherently evil, though he would never admit that.  The Arcossian Empire's primary goal in life is to conquer pretty much everything.  The Alliance of Independent Systems, a group of planetary systems of which the Sol System (ours) is a member, defeated the Arcossians in a war that lasted 26 years.  You remember that one, right?  The one where the Arcossians had a partial occupation of Earth?  No?  Weird.  I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that this doesn't happen for another 150 years.  Anyway, this war resulted in the Arossian Empire becoming pretty much nothing more than a late-night talk show monolog.  Mr. Blair, mentioned earlier, is a citizen of the AIS and was a key player in the final battles that led to the Arcossian defeat.  This did not sit well with Pahn 'Dero, who incidentally brutally killed John's father when he (John) was merely 12 years old.  So not only is Pahn 'Dero a ruthless, evil leader of a small band of renegade Arcossians bent on rebuilding the glory of the now defunct Arcossian Empire, but he also happens to be the target of a somewhat angst-filled Blair.  Which makes for a very interesting conversation when the two meet on board the Vindicator.

Pahn 'Dero - Oh, hi!  Would you care for a cup of tea?

Blair - My name is John Blair.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.

Pahn -Dero - So, no tea then?

Pahn 'Dero wants a new iPod Video for Christmas, so that is my wish for him.

Well, folks, those are my Grown-up Christmas wishes.  Happy HNT to you all.  I wish everyone, whether or not you celebrate it, a happy and safe Christmas.  And I hope you all get whatever it is your wishing for this holiday season.  What do I want for me, you ask?  I'm pretty easy to shop for.  I don't need much.  A 72-inch flat-panel HDTV will be just fine.

…and a 7.1 digital surround-sound home theater.

…with a 160-gigabyte DVR.

…and a new tablesaw.  That would be nice, too.

…Oh, and a new digital video camera with 3 CCD image processor and a hard drive.

…and a new Chevy Suburban with DVD player for the kids.

…and a 6-bedroom, 4 bath home on at least 5-acres of land. 

…and I think I'd like to go to Europe.